God The Virgin

He’s been shitting out stars, looking at ladies, drinking champagne, sleeping on his friends old cloud and screaming at boxing fights from heaven.


He burps there’s thunder over New York City and when he farts a volcano erupts in Hawaii.


He made humans and gave them controls over the growth of every other species on the plant, except their own.

He goes out with his friends, gets drunk and forgets there is a war in Iraq, because he blacked out.


He made Gluttony a sin but let’s fat people into churches.

He does not watch the news because the violence is too horrifying to him.


He’s spent so much time on our physical appearance and then tells our children not to judge others based on how they look.

But what do u expect from a 2000 year old virgin. Of course his a douche bag.